Season’s Grievings from your friends here at The Lost Highway. 2016 has been a difficult year. We lost Professor Snape, Admiral Ackbar, and even Alf. We watched as the United States of Earth was divided down the middle in a vicious election which still threatens to end in a nasty divorce. There were devastating natural disasters and Russians hacking. It’s been a real bummer.

And now to compound things it’s the holiday season, the worst wonderful time of the year. “While everybody else is opening up their presents, (others are) opening up their wrists” because “the suicide rate is always the highest around the holidays.” (Kate Beringer, Gremlins). In light of this year’s events, and the weight of the holiday season, what’s a mutant to do?

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This Xmas we decided to put together a little gift to answer that question, a list of advice gleaned from the reel world of b-movies. We watched twelve Xmas themed movies and learned twelve valuable lessons to help navigate life.

The Lost Highway proudly presents: The Twelve Slays of Xmas.

The Sixth Slay of Xmas: Santa’s Slay

If you ever see Santa’s sleigh being pulled by a reinbison: RUN! Get as far away as fast as you can. This Santa is pissed off and everyone is on his naughty list. Naughty list = dead. Think Robot Santa Claus from Futurama but played by a much angrier Goldberg.

To all our Jewish friends out there, Hanukkah doesn’t exempt you. In Santa’s hands the menorah is a terrible weapon.

Be sure to come back tomorrow for The Seventh Slay of Xmas: Don’t Open Till Christmas

Watch the trailer for “Santa’s Slay”

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